Five Minute Friday: Kate provides a word every Friday. The writer sets a timer for 5 minutes and writes whatever comes to mind.
Sometimes it's easy for me to forget that my husband is sick. It's easy for me to go on with my life and forget the heartache that is sure to be in my future; the loneliness that I will surely feel. I have to forget our plans for post-retirement...they will not happen and I'm mourning the loss of those plans.
When I remember that it's very possible that I will be alone in a few short years, it feels like the weight of the world is crashing down on me. I think that perhaps my sons are also forgetting just how sick their father really is even though to look at him you would never know it. It's so easy for all of us to go about our daily lives while forgetting what the future may very well hold.
It is so very scary to think about my life partner no longer being by my side. To have to navigate through my life without him is not something I ever thought I would be doing, but here it is. As I've written before, I'm so very thankful that God has granted us the gift of time. We have time to plan what life may look like when he's gone. Of course, I realize that those plans could very well change depending on just what His plan is.
Wow...five minutes flew by this time! I'm sure I'll be putting my thoughts to the screen again and again.
Hi Mary. As a fairly new reader and follower of your blog, I did not know that your husband is ill. I am so sorry to hear of this. My husband had a severe health problem about four years ago and he was not expected to live, so I understand and feel for you. God bless both you and your husband as you navigate an uncertain future.
ReplyDeleteThank you for taking the time to read my post and leave a comment. It's been a rollercoaster for the past 20 months. I don't know what kind of shape I would be in if I didn't have my faith!
DeleteMary, my wife's in the same position. She spent yesterday afternoon arranging stepping stones to make navigating the yard safer for me, as walking has become difficult due to a metastasis on my left femur.
ReplyDeleteI have fought the good fight, dear,
for oh, so very long,
but it's getting all too clear
that soon I must be gone,
and you will move forward,
yes, all by yourself,
stepping out in your faith toward
a better place, and not a shelf.
Certainly, mourning's allowed,
but not for very deep or long,
for it's you of whom I'm proud,
and I expect you to be strong
and brave, cheerful, always true
to the trust God placed in you.
Thank you so much for this. I'll definitely return to it over and over.
DeleteYour post made me sad. I did not know your husband was ill. None of us know the future though. All we have is today. Sending hugs and prayers that the days you and your hubby do have together will be filled with sweet moments and the blessings happy memories are made of.
ReplyDeleteBig hugs, Mary, and prayers for His sustaining power to be revealed in your life
ReplyDeleteJust stopped by from FMF #34